“Greif ” is a Reality Check

It’s been a while since I’ve last sat down to write. I have gone through a lot since December, 2015.  I lost my Nephew of Memphis, TN, my mother of Chicago. IL, and my nephew’s mom of Memphis, TN and just recently, October 28, 2016 I lost another sister of South Bend, IN.

You never know what a person is going  through by looking at their outer appearance. Looks are very deceiving. Even though a person’s outward appearance looks as though nothing is wrong, don’t be fooled. Looks are very deceiving. My sister didn’t appear to look sick to me at all. My sister Veronica lost her battle to breast cancer on October 28, 2016. I was fortunate to see my sister before she passed away. My oldest sister, and I got there in time to say our last goodbyes, while being under Hospice Care. Breast Cancer: Causes, Symptoms and Treatments – Medical News …

If there was any way of me knowing that my sister would no longer be here, I would have never left South Bend, Indiana. I now live in Memphis TN. It was her outer appearance that had me fooled. She looked as though she was never sick the last time I saw her. She had managed to make it to Memphis, TN, for my Nephew’s funeral, the day  after Christmas 2015, and she was also able to come back to Memphis, TN to attend his mother’s funeral in March, after losing our mother in February. Who would have known, that she would be the next to pass away in October?

The reason I say that grief is a reality check, is because grief is something that we will all encounter on some occasion. Grief comes in many forms. You can grieve a person, a pet, a job, even the loss of a home. What’s important is to allow yourself to grieve and seek help if needed.

We live in a society in which mental illness is very prevalent. Grief can be mentally draining. It can alter your mental state if you are not careful. It is very important to seek counseling if needed. Don’t be afraid to seek help. There are 5 Stages Of Grief‎. If you can conquer these stages, I can honestly say, that you will be well on your way of becoming healthy again.

Think of it as going to the doctor’s office to seek medical attention, to get medicine, to get well.

 

Reality TV & What’s to Come

Did you know that Shocking Statistics | Reality Television:  is 67% of all TV shows today? It is not made for clean cut viewing anymore. There is no room for it. Today TV shows is all about the real. Shows that are scripted are now being  bamboozled by the reality TV shows of today. Many of these shows are filled with negative influences and it is effecting our youths.

It is important that the time spent with our children is quality time. In today’s society, children will rather take advice from a reality star, before listening to their parents.

In these blog post I hope to have gained enough knowledge about the topic, “Media and the effects it has on our society and our youths in particular.” I will do my best to explain the importance of why, parents should communicate, and interact more with their children.

The questions below will be my focus while researching this topic. Please fill free to comment on any or  all post.

Virginia D Coburn

1. What does the Media actually do to and for young people?
2. What degree does Reality television pollute society?

3. Does Celebrity Influence  have an effect on shaping the minds of our children?

4. What fields of reality TV studies have questions about reality television?6 Studies That Prove Reality TV Is Causing the Apocalypse …

5. How do we know that reality TV effects our children learning abilities? Kids And Screen Time: What Does The Research Say … – NPR

How Technology is Changing the Way Children Think and …

6. Reality TV and children Health Television and Children – University of Michigan Health …
7.

Scholarly articles for Celebrity Influences on youths looks

 

Here We Go Again

I woke up this morning feeling good that my knee was feeling a little better today. I went to use the bathroom and returned back to my bed. I went to cut on the television, and to my surprise, on ABC channel 57 news was this picture, it caught my attention immediately. I thought to myself, “where do they do this at?”  I have to admit I was upset to see this on the news.

A Concord High School teacher has been put on paid administrative leave for instructing students to place ‘whites only’ and ‘blacks only’ signs near bathrooms and drinking fountains in the hallway of the school, according to Concord Schools Superintendent John Trout.

Trout says the social studies teacher instructed the students to post the signs in the high school hallway to demonstrate the feel of government sanctioned segregation that used to exist in parts of the country.

….read more here.

Keeping it Real

In today’s world, it’s nothing for a teenager to want cosmetic surgery to look somewhat like their favorite celebrity. But is it worth it?

According to,  Dr. Gail Gross, from The Blog, states that: “Social media — Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, SnapChat — and celebrities have created a highly-charged 24/7 cycle of unrealistic body images that your teen may aspire to. Dysmorphia, a condition in which there is dissatisfaction with body appearance, is on the rise as your teen struggles to reach perfection. In fact, in a study by the Keep It Real Campaign, 80 percent of all 10-year-old, American girls have been on a diet.” Behaviors such as starvation, vomiting and over-exercising can all lead to emotional damage, physical injury and even death, according to Dr. Gross.

Why do celebrities alter their faces and body images?  Have you seen people that has had work done to their face and bodies? You can’t miss them, because,they look like cats in the face. I can tell right away and so could many others when a person has had some kind of Cosmetic Surgery to  their face. It looks as though their face is pulled back to resemble a cat’s face. And it is also obvious when a person shrink from 300 pounds to 150 pounds that he/she has had some cosmetic surgery. Do these cosmetic surgeries influence kids to want to do the same?

 

It is sad to see that children are dieting  at such young ages to change their appearances. Many teenagers are insecure of their body image, and feel pressured to make changes. Kids have tendencies to want to look more like their favorite reality TV celebrity. But at what cost?Some parents are forking up the big bucks to please their children. It’s either get the surgery done for their child or deal with the consequences of bad behavior later.

Giving Tuesday

AFP (Wrapping an Event 5)

Tuesday, December 1, 2015

The Christmas holiday is approaching quickly.

Here is an opportunity to make someone feel good about themselves. Rather it’s cooking, cleaning or just giving time to someone that will make them feel better. We live in a world that is very materialistic, and sometimes people tend to think only of themselves. How about thinking of others this season and give on Giving Tuesday.

Now in its fourth year, Giving Tuesday, celebrated Dec. 1, has harnessed the power of social media to become an important global movement that supports giving and philanthropy. Standing in stark contrast to the seasonal commercialism of days such as Black Friday and Cyber Monday, Giving Tuesday has grown tremendously because its theme of giving back resonates with people all over the world.

I’m excited to see that giving continues to increase on Giving Tuesday. But at the end of the day, the numbers are only part of the story that AFP endeavors to tell to the philanthropist in all of us. The public spotlight that days like Giving Tuesday and National Philanthropy Day shine on philanthropy and the work of the charitable sector matter very much to those of us in the fundraising profession.  It’s only by engaging and retaining donors that we will increase giving and volunteering around the world.

Is Reality TV Fake?

No one really knows exactly how much of reality TV is reality and how much is fake, when it comes to watching reality TV shows. Unless you are an actor or someone working behind the scenes, you really don’t know the answer to that question. People get caught up in the media hype of things.

According to, Dove Self-Esteem Project

“Reality TV manages to pull the wool over our eyes, because the truth is it looks very like reality, very much like your own life – different to celebrity culture. People have relationships, make up and break up, have babies and raise children, just as we all do; so you’re tricked into believing it’s true. Only, when you look a bit closer, you realise that everything is blown way out of proportion.”

“Of course, a lot of it isn’t true ­– but the fact is that the best reality TV isn’t entirely false either. For a scene to work there’s got to be a grain of truth about what’s happening. But what the programme-makers tend to do is inflate it dramatically to make it work on-screen. So, for example, an argument will work best when two people have a real reason to be angry with one another – and the programme-makers will fan the flames. They’ll keep a rumour mill going; they’ll say: ‘Do you know what so-and-so was up to last night?” read more….

http://www.onthemedia.org/story/258741-reality-tv-even-faker-you-think/

Even though Reality TV ratings is at a record time high, people has it fixated in their minds that reality TV is real. Come on People don’t believe the hype.

Hooked on reality TV

Reality TV has been on a rise expanding for years now and it has officially reached the level of stupidity. Many people around the world sit down after a long day of work and unwind with their favorite reality TV shows, but little do they know… they are not getting smarter, unfortunately they are getting dumber by the second.

With our generation glued to the TV night after night watching shows religiously like “The Bachelor”(abc.go.com/shows/the-bachelor) and “Jersey Shore,” (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jersey_Shore_(TV_series) there is nothing to be learned, but for some reason we keep watching it. Once we start, we can’t stop and then before you know it the day is over.

Reality TV is like garbage for the mind. It is also like a highly addictive drug. It may feel good and calm you down to watch people who have bigger problems than you, but at the end of the show, there is absolutely nothing gained and only time lost.

Right now we live in a world taken over by shows like “Here Comes Honey Boo”(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Here_Comes_Honey_Boo_Boo) and “Real Housewives” (http://www.bravotv.com) of every city in the United States. Shows like these not only look stupid for the viewers, but they make them ignorant and oblivious to the real world.

Look at the Kardashians (http://www.eonline.com/shows/kardashians) for instance. A regular wealthy family doing outlandish things that got turned into a multi-million dollar empire because they got a TV show on E!. Today you can’t go one day without hearing their names or reading an article about them on the internet.

It’s come to the point where reality TV is like a guilty pleasure to people. It’s like a drug that can be taken without feeling guilty, just so they can chill and watch some drama go down. Whether it’s watching Kim Kardashian or Honey Boo Boo, eating her mother’s ’s famous spaghetti, butter and ketch-up, people are still going to be glued to the TV waiting to see what will happen next.

Many people claim to hate reality TV and everything it stands for, but those are the same exact people who sit down night after night watching the people they just hated on. After hours and hours of watching reality TV, the human brain can shut down, and nothing seems important except the little fantasy world that you’re living in. http://www.eruptingmind.com/effects-of-tv-on-brain/

Every once in a while a reality show like “Shark Tank,” where you can actually learn something comes into play. “Shark Tank” is special though because it’s not like watching someone’s everyday life and it’s more about learning about business. “Shark Tank” teaches you many things: like how to invest your money, grow a company and think smarter. Unfortunately, there aren’t many reality TV shows like “Shark Tank.”

 

Instead of watching “Jersey Shore” (http://www.tv.com/shows/jersey–shore)and increasing your stupidity, you can be doing something that is productive like; working out at the gym or socializing with some friends. I know it can be very addictive and even relaxing at times, but it isn’t doing a thing to help you in the long run.

People should think first before picking up the TV remote control. Think about all the productive things you could be doing with that precious time and all of the goals you can accomplish.

The Parent Trap

Today a child is more likely to listen and take advise from a celebrity off of a reality TV show than their parents. With this trend it is important for parents to take an active role in their child’s lives.

Research, has  shown that celebrities can have a profound negative influence (http://www.teenink.com › Opinion › Entertainment / Celebrities) on a child’s behavior. Some of the influence comes from media sources who tend to thrive on negative behavior as opposed to those who are making a positive difference in people lives.

Kids look up to celebrities, and when they see them doing bad things, kids think it’s okay. Kids that has watched child  star actress, Lindsey Lohan from, The Parent Trap and Freaky Friday, might get the idea that drugs and alcohol is a fine thing to do.

The media has painted a picture to youths, that it is ok to do these things with little to no consequences. Lindsey Lohan, was arrested for a DUI (driving under the influence) on several occasions and was only given a slap on the risk. What is it going to take for parents to realize that TV can have damaging affects on our youth and their behavior?

Don’t get trapped parents.

 

Does Reality TV Corrupt our Children?

Argument and Persuasion

Many people would say that reality T.V shows have a corrupting influence on the minds of youth, I am one of these people. Reality shows, which make up 67% of all television shows, definitely have an influencing role on the behavior of  teens. Shocking Statistics | Reality Television

Reality T.V shows are a bad influence on the minds of many teenagers. They teach that it is ok to be profane, dress inappropriately, and even that it’s ok in becoming a teen mom. This is not how youth should be acting and I believe that reality T.V. shows have a direct influence on this negative change in the way teenagers act.

When it comes to influences, reality T.V.  in my opinion has a definite  profound affect on our youths. Reality TV, has  an influence on the way that many young teenage girls act. A study conducted by the Girl Scout Research Institute – Research shows that a higher percentage of girls believe that it is a normal thing to do, backstabbing their friends and gossiping about other people. They see this behavior on a reality TV show and in their minds it is ok to act this way.

These shows also affect how young people dress.  Many kids try to dress  and look like their favorite reality television star. Some kids have been going out and getting plastic surgery as well as wearing more revealing clothing because that’s what the girls do on the shows.

We’ve seen fans go to outrageous lengths to show their dedication to their idols. Some bleach their eyebrows (i.e. Miley Cyrus’ Smilers); some cut their hair (i.e. Justin Bieber’s Beliebers); heck, some even permanently ink themselves. But as far as extremes go, these people take the cake…

While we live by the motto ‘Love the skin you’re in,’ some simply don’t. Or at least don’t believe they can. So, they went for an alternative — undergoing major plastic surgery to look like their favorites celebrities:

Read more: http://www.teen.com/2014/01/13/random-stuff/fans-who-got-plastic-surgery-to-look-like-celebrities/#ixzz3u9rnIt69

Parents should maybe, finds ways to interact and communicate more with their children on a daily basis. Parents should monitor their children daily activities more closely, this will allow parents to see exactly how much time is spent on watching  these reality TV shows, that depicts negative behavior.

AFP Philanthropy Day Event

Wrapping up an Event (3)

Have you ever wanted to know how people ask for donations at  Fundraiser events?

I remember when I was a kid and wanting to be the first one who raised the most money for selling candy apples for a prize at my school. I would have my family members to help by taking my candy apples to their work places. Some of them wouldn’t want to take them, but I would practically beg them until they submitted to my puppy dog face.

I attended this year’s AFP Philanthropy Day event at the Hilton Garden Inn, yesterday and it was very informative. I was excited to hear what strategies, Mathew Downey, the guest host speaker, used in becoming a successful fundraiser. He spoke on the topic of sustainability from the book, Focus on Sustainability: A Nonprofit’s Journey Paperback – 2013. by Dennis G. McMillian (Author)

According to McMillian’s summary in his book, “Whether you are a seasoned Nonprofit leader or you’re just getting started, this book provides helpful insights into what makes a Sustainability organizations . The author uses a model to describe a holistic approach to sustainability.

The guest speaker did an excellent job of breaking down each chapter in this book. As stated in this book, “Each chapter explores a factor in the model and clearly articulated how nonprofits can use that factor as a lens to make strategic decisions. The central factor is focus – or a clear understanding of why the organization exists. Moving from that central factor, the book maintains that organizations practicing sustainably will recruit the right people for board and staff positions, engage in new relationships with other organizations, raise more money from individuals, and become more entrepreneurial in order to increase earned revenue. After successfully applying these factors, or lenses, in decision making, organizations can begin to understand the dynamics of sustainability and how to apply them every day as they carry out their mission. This book contains many tips and tools that readers can use right away. Chapter 1 begins with an overview of the model and briefly describes the importance of impact and ways of using logic models to help evaluate an organization. Chapters 2 through 5 each provide insight into one of the four specific factors of sustainability. In these chapters, The author shares stories on how organizations used one of these factors, either intentionally or coincidentally, to become stronger. A series of appendices provide useful tools and supplemental information to help organizations begin a sustainability journey. Focus on Sustainability is designed to be a guide, an inspiration, and a chance to shake up long-held nonprofit management theories. It encourages readers to return to it often and use it in different contexts, such as board and staff meetings and perhaps as the subject of a retreat. It is intended to be a useful aide for the dedicated board members and staff who serve the sector every day.”

The intent of this session was to facilitate learning and dialogue  with participants by using a Holistic approach to fundraising. Using this approach according to the author, can make an impact on an organization ability to become successful.”

I found the seminar to be very informative and helpful. There was a good response from the audience and I left with a feeling of having more confidence in myself and my capabilities of doing a fundraiser event.